By Moa Karlberg – 2004: Brandy lives in a trailer on the countryside with her alcoholic father and her six months old son Christian. Life is poor and messy, but abortion was never an option. George W Bush is soon to be re-elected, and there are many in Missouri supporting the strict abortion laws. Brandy just turned 19, I am 20. I follow her every step and every mood swing, help taking care of Christian, and we become friends talking a lot about the differences of our lives. 2009: Same trailer. Same father, but he is in detox now. Brandy has always been skinny, but now she is boney. Her eyes are tired. The kids – she gave birth to two more – are gone, Brandy lost custody due to drug abuse. She has been married and divorced. I clean up the kitchen mess, listen, give advice. I hardly photograph anything, it feels wrong to use the camera. 2014: After years of no contact I finally find Brandy on Facebook. She looks healthier and happier on the photos. She stopped using drugs, lives with her new boyfriend and their little daughter, Brandy’s fourth child, in a St Louis suburb. Brandy’s father passed away last fall. Christian is nine years now, he lives with his grandmother together with his two sisters. They recently started visiting Brandy in weekends. Grandma is their mother, Brandy is their ”birthmom”.
001: 2014. Brandy's kids visit in the weekend. Two intensive days with a big family in a small apartment.002: 2004. Brandy cleaning Christian's ears in the bedroom in the trailer they share with Brandy's father. Christian is six months old.003: 2009. The same bedroom. Brandy's father is in detox and her own life is a mess. Christian is at his grandma's.004: 2004. Brandy and her boyfriend in the car.005: 2014. Brandy, her four kids and her mom visits for the weekend. Two intensive days with a big family in a small apartment.006: 2009. Brandy has married and divorced. The wedding dress hangs in her wardrobe.007: 2014. Brandy's daughters try out her wedding dress. “It's very special for me to see you in this. One day maybe you will wear it at your own wedding”, says Brandy.008: 2014. Brandy and her fourth child Zoey, the only living with her at the moment, taking a nap.009: 2014. Brandy and Christian in the car. Christian is nine years old.010: 2009. Trying to sort things out. Long talks with lawyers, social workers and friends.011: 2004. Brandy and her boyfriend get into a fight in the car, and stop at the highway to continue outside. I stay in the back seat with a crying Christian.012: 2004. Brandy taking a break in the neighborhood.013: 2014. Brandy and Zoey taking a break in the neighborhood.014: 2004. Brandy is 19 years old.015: 2004. Friends playing with Christian.016: 2004. Brandy poses in the fathers trailer.017: 2009. Brandy is 23 years old. Life is a mess.018: 2009. Brandy is 23 years old. Life is a mess.019: 2014. Brandy's fourth child Zoey.020: 2004. Brandy's first child Christian.021: 2004. To do list: Talk to case worker about welfare benefits. Get a part time job. Get signed up for anger management classes.022: 2014. To do: Set up anger management A.S.A.P023: 2014. Christian playing with his sister.024: 2009. Brandy has a short reunion with the same boyfriend she used to have in 2004.025: 2014. Brandy's boyfriend and Zoey doing grocery shopping.026: 2004. Brandy and her first child Christian.027: 2004. Brandy and her boyfriend on the terrace of her fathers trailer.028: 2004. Brandy and her first child Christian.029: 2004. Outside Brandy's fathers trailer near Arnold, Missouri.030: Brandy's daughters in the car.031: 2009. Brandy is 23 years old. Life is a mess.032: 2014. In the kitchen of Brandy's and her boyfriends apartment.033: 2014. Brandy and her fourth child Zoey.034: 2014. Zoey, wintertime.035: 2014. Brandy talking important stuff with her oldest daughter.036: 2004. Christian, six months old.037: 2014. Christian, nine years old.038: 2009. Brandy has a short reunion with the same boyfriend she used to have in 2004. Together they browse through my images from the first visit.039: 2014. Zoey in the kitchen.040: 2014. Brandy's daughters trying out her wedding dress.041: 2004. Brandy with her first child Christian.042: 2009. Brandy at her fathers trailer.043: 2009. Brandy is 23 years old. Life is a mess.